


Memories of an Unknown Past (Unforgettable)

by olive_swan



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Bullying, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Childhood, Coffee, Coffee Shops, Death, Dreams, Evil, Friendship, Funerals, Gen, Ghouls, Like no happiness, Money, Reading, Sadness, Short Lived Happiness, Violence, quinx squad - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-07-24 19:03:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7519654
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/olive_swan/pseuds/olive_swan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The half-ghoul ghoul investigator, Haise Sasaki, has always been a mystery to all four members of the Quinx Squad, who would love to know more about their beloved mentor. </p><p>Unfortunately, it's nearly impossible to get <em>any</em> information on who (and what) he was in the past, seeing as though he has no memories of the first twenty years of his life and their superiors refuse to give out any information. </p><p>He's surrounded in mystery, with more questions then answers.</p><p>Why is his hair black <em>and</em> white if he didn't dye it?<br/>How did he get turned into a half-ghoul?<br/>Why was he turned into a half-ghoul?<br/>What happened to him to make him feared by even the higher ups when he goes out of control?</p><p>Just who is he?</p><p>These questions seem to have no answers for the Quinx.<br/>That is, until a strange dream occurs. </p><p>Is this the four's chance to learn the mysterious past of their superior?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Night 1: The Strange Occurrence and The Seemingly Perfect Childhood... Or Not? (What is it like to be loved?)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Memoirs of a Half-Ghoul](https://archiveofourown.org/works/3858184) by [kenkamishiro](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kenkamishiro/pseuds/kenkamishiro). 



> This is my 4th ongoing fan fic (although I've basically given up on Keep it a Secret by now. Don't worry. I'll update the other two though).  
> Enjoy

The night started out slightly different then any other so far:

The day had been filled with endless investigating for a new ghoul, leaving all members of the Quinx squad dog-tired. They all stumbled into the chateau, hastily toeing off their shoes and throwing their coats haphazardly somewhere in the general direction of the coat rack in the corner while Shirazu dumped Saiko off of his back and onto the couch and Haise attempted to liven everybody up with some cheesy pep talk. 

~

"Come on, guys!" Haise practically skipped into the kitchen to prepare the group's dinner after neatly placing his shoes and coat in their appropriate places. "This is the most progress we've made on a case in a day! I think this deserves a special dinner!"

Mutsuki sighed, seating himself at the counter. "You don't have to make anything big, Sasaki-san. You must be tired."

"It's fine, Mutsuki-kun! You guys deserve it," Haise said, getting out the necessary ingredients and tools to make the meal. "Plus, I enjoy making you guys food."

"Are you sure?..."

"Of course!"

"If you say so..."

~

The squad ate dinner before heading off to bed, after, of course, complimenting Haise on his excellent cooking and wishing him goodnight. They all went to sleep at their own pace, most passing out as soon as their head hit their pillow. Miraculously, Saiko fell asleep before 23:00, exhausted from work and under the threat that her progress in all of her games would be deleted if she was ever not up before 7:30 on a work day even again. 

That's when it got... weirder...:

\---

 _I guess I'll have to sneak my DS into work again... I have to get the gem discount..._ Saiko yawned as she was pulled into the dark depths of sleep. 

...

_Wait... What?_

She looked around, taking in the pale walls and wooden floors of the small house which she had appeared in. 

_Where am I?..._

"Mom! Mom! What does this mean?" Suddenly, a small boy, no older then six years old, ran through her legs, heading deeper into the house, towards a warm, dimly lit room. And I don't mean he ran past her, maybe accidentally bumping into her just to keep going, I mean he ran _through_ her, like she wasn't even there. He raced past, holding a book tightly to his chest, as if it was the most precious thing in the world. She followed warily, watching as the boy entered the room and excitedly sat next to a woman kneeling over a table on the floor. 

The woman looked at the boy, smiling slightly. She looked sickly, hair streaked with grey and face wrinkled with dark shadows under her eyes. She ran a finger over the kanji character the boy was pointing at, eyeing it before looking the boy in the eye. Her smile widened by a fraction, the skin around her eyes wrinkling even more. "That means a sudden, violent rainstorm that usually doesn't last long. It's called 'cloudburst'." 

The boy grinned even wider. "Thank you, mommy!" 

"It's no problem, Ken."

The boy turned to a new page in the book, scanning it over before pointing to a new character. "What does this one mean?"

"It means..."

Saiko tuned the pair out, deciding to instead look around the small room. It was mostly bare, consisting of only a table which the pair was sitting in front of, covered by layers of paper and folders; a small cushion being occupied by the woman; a lamp, illuminating the small room, leaving the corners in shadow; and a thin rug, reaching around the room, leaving a foot or two of hard wood around the edges. Besides the two in front of the table and herself, the room seemed to seemed to be unoccupied... Until Saiko noticed Shirazu, seated against the wall on the other side of the room next to one of the three doorways, observing the pair in the middle of the room. 

"Shirazu!" Saiko hissed, hopping over the papers that littered the floor to get to the orange haired man. 

His head whipped up, eyes wide. He stared at Saiko, narrowing his eyes. "Why are you here?"

"How should I know? I just kinda appeared here..."

Shirazu patted the spot next to him before looking back at the two in the middle of the room, who were still engrossed in the book. "Seems like we might be here a while."

"Yeah..." She sat down lightly beside him, going back to watching the two before her. They stayed in silence for a while, content with just observing their surroundings, before Saiko spoke up once again. She turned to the other. "Speaking of... Where _is_ 'here'?" 

Shirazu seemed to think for a few seconds, staring out the blackened window on the opposite wall. "I honestly don't know."

"We must still be in Japan, at least. They _are_ speaking fluent Japanese and I heard the TV on in another room, which is also in Japanese..."

Both whipped around, eyes widening as they saw Mutsuki hesitantly poke his head out from the doorway the two were sat by. He was pushed out of the way, revealing Urie with his usual pissed-off face. They both settled down beside the two already sitting, joining them in watching the two who sat in the middle of the room, the boy now reading by himself while the woman continued to fill out forms that littered the table and fold paper into small flowers, which were dropped into a bag beside the table.

Shirazu shook his head, looking away from the two. "You've got a point..."

With that, they went back into silence. 

"Hey, guys..." Mutsuki glanced towards the other three Quinx nervously. 

"Yeah?"

"Hmmmm?"

"What? (we were fine being silent)"

He looked towards the boy reading, narrowing his eyes slightly. "Is it just me, or does that boy look familiar?"

Shirazu followed the green haired boy's gaze, squinting slightly. "You know what," he looked back to the others, "he actually does. But I just can't figure out who..."

"He looks like Sasaki (idiots. Couldn't you figure that out yourselves. We see him every day)," Urie mumbled, not bothering to look towards the other three. 

Saiko nodded. "Yeah, he does. But didn't his mom say that his name was Ken?"

"Who says 'Haise Sasaki' is his real name?" Urie crossed his arms, moving his gaze to stare out the window into the darkness of the outside world. 

"Although I hate to say it-" Shirazu looked away from Urie, focusing his gaze once again on the boy "-Urie has a point. Just who _is_ Sassan?"

"I-"

"Ken, you should get to bed." The woman turned towards the boy, smiling slightly as she patted his head. "Don't want to be late for school in the morning."

"Okay!" With that the boy stood, hugged the woman briefly, and left, probably to his room. "See you soon?"

"Of course." The woman turned back to her work as if nothing happened, rubbing her eyes quickly. 

From then on, time seemed to flow faster, everything going inhumanly quickly. The moon sailed through the sky, making way for the sun; the woman did not leave her spot, not even leaving to check on the child, as she had said she would. 

The four Quinx sat in silence, unmoving as they watched the sky get brighter and brighter as the pile of paper flowers grew, until the paper stopped folding and the woman passed out from exhaustion, falling atop the piles of paper, sending some flying off the table and onto the floor. 

Soon, the boy returned, dressed in what Saiko assumed to be his school clothes. He quietly stepped towards the woman, draping a soft blanket over her shoulders and removing her glasses, placing them in the table beside her. "Sleep well," he whispered, before stepping away and through the door. 

Time seemed to speed up again, and the woman woke up, hastily looking over to a clock on the wall before gathering her things and leaving, taking the bag of flowers and pile of founders along with her. 

The house remained empty aside from the four, and the clock continued to tick fast, slowing down when the door opened again to reveal the boy. He still wore his school clothing and carried a dirtied backpack. He placed it on the table, opening it up to grab it's contents. He gently placed a few papers on the table before heading off into a dark room, which lit up after a few seconds. The new light illuminated a wall covered in bookshelves, all filled with books. 

Saiko stood before heading over to the desk to look at the papers. 

They were tests, three in all, all marked in red pen with a '100'. 

_Impressive..._ She distantly thought before following Mutsuki, who had gotten up, into the room the boy had disappeared into. 

It appeared to be some type of study, complete with a desk, chair, rug, and bookshelves lined with books. The boy sat at the desk, hunched over a book. Mutsuki hesitantly walked up to him, looking over his shoulder at the book. 

He gasped slightly. 

"What is it?" Shirazu poked his head through the doorway. Urie pushed past him. 

Mutsuki glanced back the the others before looking again at the book. "This book isn't for children."

"What book is it?" Saiko asked. 

"It's _'The Metamorphosis'_ by Franz Kafka."

"What?"

Mutsuki sighed, glancing over his shoulder. "It's a German book, published in the early 1900's, about a traveling salesman who wakes up one day turned into a giant insect. It has about four chapters, but all four are very long, and is about how his family reacts. It's a tragedy... It's not meant for children, as I said before... It's studied in a few colleges, said to be one of the greatest fiction works in the 20th century..."

"Woah there, literature wiz-" Saiko held up a hand, shaking her head "-we didn't need the geek version."

Mutsuki blushed, turning away, suddenly taking great interest in a crack in the wall behind the desk. "I-I just thought that..."

"It's _fine_ , Tooru," Shirazu laughed. "Saiko's just bein' an ass."

"O-okay..."

Their attention turned back to the boy as he flipped open a notebook and copied a kanji character down on the page before going back to reading. 

Once again, time sped up, showed by the clock on the desk as the hands spun too fast and the increase of speed in the timing it took the boy to turn a page and write something down. 

The increase of speed stopped as the sound of the door opening and closing was heard from the main room. 

"Mommy!" The boy jumped up, taking a slip of paper from the desk, and raced out the door. The four followed and watched as the boy tackled the newly arrived woman in a hug. She reached down and patted the boy's head, smiling softly, before gently pushing him off and heading to the table in the middle of the room. "How was your day?"

"It was good, Ken." She reached a hand up to scratch at her chin, setting a stack of papers on the table and dropping an empty bag beside it, which once held dozens of handmade, origami flowers. "How was your day?"

The boy hesitated slightly before smiling brightly, copying his mother by scratching his chin. "It was good. Nothing big happened; it was pretty normal."

"That's good, Ken," was all the woman said before turning away from the child and starting her work. 

The boy glanced at the paper in his hand, gripping it tightly, before hesitantly looking up at his mother. "...Mom?"

She didn't look up. "What is it, Ken? Mommy's trying to work."

"Uh-ummm..." He shuffled his feet before taking a deep breath and looking up. "My class is going on a field trip to a museum in a few days... I was wondering if I could go... Th-the fee's about 1000 yen-"

"Ken."

He froze, eyes wide as he watched his mother turn to him slowly. "...Y-yes?"

She slowly stood from where she was seated, stepping towards the boy. "Is what I have already given you not enough?"

"I-it's enough! I-I'm sor-sorry for ask-asking!..." The boy started to back away, but stopped as a hand tightly gripped his shoulder, nails digging into the skin through his shirt. 

The woman glared at him, raising a hand high above her head. "Is it not good enough?!" She yelled, bringing her hand down. "You selfish child! Take what you have and don't ask for more! Don't bother other people with your selfish needs!" A loud _smack!_ echoed throughout the small apartment as her hand hit hard on his cheek, sending him falling to the floor. She kneeled beside his trembling form as he curled into a tight ball. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm-"

"Am I not good enough?!" She smacked him again, and again, and again, leaving dark bruises in her wake. 

The four Quinx watched in horror as the child was beaten, all for asking the innocent question of if he could go on a school trip. Even Urie, who's daily moods could be described in 'fifty shades of pissed off', let out a slight gasp, eyes widening by a fraction. But nobody cared to make some stupid joke on the slight display of emotion by the other, they were all too horrified at the sight before them: a mother beating her own child for no reason.

The beating continued, leaving the boy bruised and letting out small sobs, until the woman sat back, frame shaking in anger mixed with sadness. "I try my best, Ken. How can you not see that?" She closed her eyes, trying to stop the tears that threatened to spill. 

The boy weakly crawled out of her reach, letting out broken sobs as he went. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." he cried, pulling himself towards the study in the other room. 

The four Quinx stared at the aftermath of the scene, unbelieving of what just happened. 

_Who knew, they seemed so happy. The boy- Ken- looked like he was expecting it, too... Poor boy..._ Saiko faintly felt her bottom lip tremble and a tear slip from her eye as she slowly turned to the study. She hesitantly stepped towards it, afraid of what she might see; the heartbreak in the boy's eyes, the brokenness of his expression. What she saw, however, was different. The boy sat, curled in a corner, hunched over a book. She could slightly see his redened eyes over the top of the cover, which got rubbed frequently. 

"He looked like he expected it..." Saiko jumped at the voice behind her, whipping her head around. She let out a breath when she saw it was only Urie, stoic mask cracked to reveal a concerned face, staring straight at the small boy in the corner. "It must happen often."

Saiko just nodded, keeping her eyes on the boy. 

The boy stayed there as the other two appeared behind them. 

"She just went back to normal..." Shirazu grumbled, crossing his arms. "That bitch..."

They stayed like that, silent, as time sped up again. 

The boy didn't move until time went back to normal and his mother called out. "Ken! It's time for dinner!"

"O-okay!..." He shakily got up from his clearly uncomfortable position on the floor, gently placing his book on the desk, before walking through the four teenagers and out of the room. The Quinx followed him, being led to a small kitchen with few appliances and a small table in the center. 

A plate was set down in front of the boy as he sat, filled with a tasty looking meat. The woman gently patted him on the head (he flinched) before sitting down herself, a similar plate set before her. 

"I'm sorry, Ken," she spoke softly, gazing at the boy. "I just don't want you to turn out to be one of the selfish, bad members of society. So I made you your favorite."

"Th-thank you, mommy..." With that, the boy quietly started eating his meal, a hamburger stake. 

The Quinx sat softly by the doorway, watching the pair eat in silence. 

The meal was going nicely, with both members enjoying their food, until the quiet was cut through by the ringing of a doorbell- their doorbell. The woman swiftly got up, ignoring her child as he stiffened and seemed to shrink into his skin. She quickly grabbed a wad on bills from the counter before heading to the door. It was opened, revealing another woman, looking similar to the boy's mother, except for her lack of wrinkles and healthy looking appearance. 

She clasped her hands in front of her, as if begging, and put on a bright (fake) smile. "Our fridge broke and we're running out of food, could we please have a little extra today?" She immediately said, not even bothering to say 'hello' or 'good to see you' or something along those lines. 

"I'm sorry... This is all I can give. There's a little extra, but that was all I could afford." The boy's mother weakly smiled, gently handing the woman the money. 

She snatched it out of her hands, greedily flipping through the bills, before slowing and putting on a small smile. "Thank you so much." You could heard the sarcasm dripping from her words, but seemed to go unnoticed by the woman. 

Saiko glanced back at the boy. He had moved, choosing instead to hide around the corner, and watched the two fearfully. His mouth moved, but all she could hear was faint mumbling. She strained her ears. "Please go away... Please go away..." He repeated under his breath, glaring weakly at the woman as she left and his mother closed the door behind her. 

"Come out, Ken." His mother stiffly walked back to the table, glancing towards her son around the corner. 

He hesitantly stepped out of his hiding spot. "Wh-why do we help her?" 

"She's my sister." The woman sat down, sighing. "I have to help her."

"But we don't have enough to help-"

"That's enough, Ken," she said sternly, continuing with her meal. 

The boy quietly settled back down in front of his plate, hastily eating his food. 

As the boy and his mother ate, the surroundings started to blur, being replaced with static. Saiko glanced towards her squad mates, seeing them slowly evaporating from view. The static grew as the word faded to black. 

\---

Saiko's eyes snapped open to the sound of her alarm. 

She sat up, smashing the button on her clock for it to 'shut the hell up'. _That was weird..._ she thought, rubbing her eyes sleepily. 

"Saiko-chan! It's time to get up!" Her mentor yelled from behind her door, knocking loudly. 

She groaned, ripping off her covers. "I'm up!" She stood wobbly, heading to her dresser to grab her uniform. 

"Breakfast is ready if you want any!" She heard footsteps retreating, signaling that her mentor/Maman had left. 

The weird dream came back to her as she thought of the boy, Ken. 

_Is that really Maman? Was that who he was?_


	2. Night 2: From Happiness to Despair (What is it like to be selfish?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everybody who left comments on the last chapter! They really helped!
> 
> I will try to post a chapter every Monday, just in case you're wondering (you don't know how much I had to hold back from posting this earlier). 
> 
> Anyways...
> 
> I made the mistake of listening to "Come on Break it Down for Me" from Owari no Seraph while writing this. 
> 
> Don't listen to "The 14th Melody" (with the words) from D.Gray-Man either. 
> 
> Or "Stop and Stare" by One Republic. 
> 
> That's crying material right there. Either that, or I am just really sensitive. 
> 
> Really, just don't listen to any sad music while reading this. 
> 
> Also, idk why I need to say this, but "Viva la Vida" by Coldplay reminds me of Kaneki. 
> 
> Now, enjoy what I have written.

The investigation filled most of the Quinx's day, giving them little to no time to reflect on the boy they had seen in their dream the previous night. It got to the point where the black haired boy was almost completely forgotten, his memory replaced with information that is to be forgotten later. 

He was remembered by all as soon as they faced their beds, hoping not to be thrown into that horrible reality once again. The reality of the world's past mistakes.

He avoided his bed as much as possible, rearranging his room, spending as much time as possible getting ready, wandering around; until his mentor saw and stopped him, sending him to get some rest.

He had tried not to look at the man with pity and sorrow. He wasn't sure if he succeeded.

So, he lay in his bed, trying to keep his eyes open until he couldn't anymore and he was thrown unwillingly into the void.

\---

When he gave in to the darkness around the edges of his vision, he was almost immediately brought back to the house from the night before, sitting back in the dimly lit room the mother and her child occupied. Though, this time, instead of the boy reading his morbid books while his mother filled out papers and folded neat, origami flowers, they seemed to be in an important conversation. Well, it was more like a one-sided argument, with the woman yelling at the boy, who cowered below her. 

"What did I say about hurting others?!" She screamed, glaring at the boy. 

He sobbed. "B-be the one-one getting hur-hurt... not th-the one hur-hurting oth-others," he stuttered, covering his face with his arms as his mother brought her hand down on his cheek with force, revealing a dark bruise when it was removed. He whimpered, not retaliating as the beating continued. 

Shirazu heard a gasp beside him and turned to see Mutsuki, along side Urie and Saiko. "Why?" He whispered, wiping away the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes.

"I don't know..." Shirazu choked out, turning his gaze back to the pair as he gently rubbed the other's back. 

The woman continued to beat the boy until, finally, she stopped, turning back to her work. "Selfish child..." she muttered, not sparing a glance his way as he weakly crawled away, whimpering. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." He slowly pulled himself back to the study, most likely to drown his sorrows in his books, like the last time it had occurred. 

The Quinx stood in unison, heading quickly to the study, where they watched as the boy cried quietly behind a thick book. 

They watched for a while, not speaking, until the boy cried himself to sleep, curled in the corner of the bookshelf. 

From there, the soft ticking of the clock became faster and faster, until their surroundings faded to black. Soon, the color slowly returned, this time, instead, bringing the four to a school classroom, the teacher absent and the ending of a bell just heard. It was occupied by a few students, who seemed to be leaving, and the black haired boy, Ken. He sat at a desk, nose deep in a book. 

The Quinx, minus Urie, who stood by the door, hesitantly approached him. They stopped, however, when a blonde haired boy ran through their legs, heading straight for Ken. He plopped himself on the seat belonging to the desk in front of the black haired boy. The blonde stared at him over the top of his book, earning a startled yelp from the other when he noticed. 

"What're you reading?!" The blonde asked, overly enthusiastic. 

Ken leaned back slightly before answering, hesitant. "Um... The Dra..."

"Is it good?!"

"Um, yeah..."

The blond sniffed, sounding like a bag of marbles*. "Hey... You're always reading by yourself."

"I-is that wrong?" 

"That's not how I meant it." The blonde lightly scratched the side of his face nervously. "I just moved here. And I don't have any friends yet! So would you be my friend?" He smiled, just as bright as his hair. 

Ken blinked rapidly. "Huh? Uh..."

"No?!"

"N-no, no... I will!!"

"Really?! Sweet!"

Shirazu grinned as he watched as Ken smiled shyly and the other boy started talking animatedly about various topics, not bugging the black haired boy as he went back to reading. The blonde Quinx glanced at his squad mates, grinning even wider when he saw them smiling, too. 

The scene faded to black once again, and the blonde's talking slowly grew quieter and quieter until it too faded. 

This time, when the color returned, instead of the bright haired boy and a sunny day in a classroom, it was a monochrome scene, with hints of pale colors here and here, of a misty graveyard. The boy, Ken, could be seen, wearing a small, soaked, black suit, standing in front of a dull grave, decorated with a few new, white flowers. 

The boy was unresponsive other then his despaired sobs and flowing tears as a few people passed by, also wearing black, and patted him softly on his shoulder, whispering meaningless _'I'm sorry for your loss'_ s and _'Poor kid'_ s. 

A woman, the same one who had showed up at the boy's mother's apartment for money, stopped at the grave, kneeling beside the boy. She replaced her small smirk with a sad smile, patting him on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Ken," she whispered.

He didn't look up. 

"Little sister was a good person. I'll make sure to take just as good care of you as she did." She smiled slightly before standing, stepping quietly away as her smile turned back into the evil smirk she wore before. 

Shirazu watched, unblinking, as she disappeared into the mist and Ken didn't move from his spot in front of the grave. 

The grave, he now realized, belonged to the boy's mother. 

~

_"Hey, mom!" The boy ran towards his mother, book in hand along with his notebook and a pen. He stopped beside the woman who was slumped over on top of her piles of papers and shook her shoulder when she didn't respond. "Mom?" He shook her shoulder harder, growing frantic. "Mom? Mom! Wake up!" He lifted her head gently, bringing it off the table. Her eyes remained tightly shut. "Mommy, please wake up!" He continued to shake her, but she didn't even flinch. Panicking, he placed her head back down on the table and rushed out of the room. He came back in with a phone, which he pressed to his ear with shaking hands. "Please, my mom won't wake up!"_

\---

_"She overworked herself, kid. She's in a better place now."_

_"No! No, no, no no nonono!" He cried, knees giving out as he fell to the floor. "Sh-she can't be d-dead... She couldn't leave me!"_

_"I'm sorry."_

~

He didn't know what to feel as he also realized that the boy would now be in the care of the thieving monster of that woman, his aunt.

The rain continued to poor down as the rest of the few people who were there left, disappearing into the surrounding mist. Ken didn't move from his spot as his tears slowly dried, only to be replaced by different tears: those of the sky. 

Slowly, the grey of the sky took over the four's vision and once again faded to black.

The next scene was brighter, seeming to be early morning. 

Shirazu looked along the path they stood on that ran alongside a river, gleaming from the rays of the sun, which hung low in the sky. He ran ahead, motioning the other three to follow, as he spotted Ken up ahead, head down as he carried the same dirty backpack on his shoulders. The four caught up, walking a little ways to the side of the boy and watched as he made his way, slowly, down the path, not looking up to even glance at the other students who talked and laughed with their friends as they passed. 

Suddenly, Ken lifted his head, just as the four turned their's, and saw the blond boy running towards him. He tackled Ken in a hug from behind, spinning him around in his arms to face him, the blonde placing his hands on the other's shoulders. 

"How long were you planning on staying home, you jerk?!"

"...huh?"

"Do you know how horrible it has been on my own?" The blonde continued, shaking the other's shoulders. 

"Sorry Hide." Ken sighed, looking away. 

"Sure, sure. Now come on, we gotta go!" With that, the blonde pulled the other along with him as he ran down the path. 

Shirazu glanced at the others to see their expression similar to his, a mix of sadness and happiness. 

Slowly, his vision faded to black again, but this time, instead of coloring to another scene, he was met with the sound of his alarm clock. 

He sat up quickly, slamming the button on top for it to stop screaming bloody murder. He groaned, rubbing his eyes, as he stood from his bed. 

He distantly heard his mentor slamming pots and pans together, trying to wake up Saiko without leaving the kitchen. 

Pulling on his uniform, Shirazu slammed his door open. "Don't worry, Sassan. I got it!" He yelled, silencing his mentor. 

"Thank you, Shirazu!"

With a yawn, he made his way down the hall to drag the shut-in from her bed. 

He distantly thought back to his weird dream, now coming two nights in a row. _If that's really Sassan, just what has he been through? Was he really abused as a child?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *That's what my dad says it sounds like whenever I sniff with a stuffy nose.
> 
> Eh, I like this chapter and I don't. This one (unlike the other one) I wrote in a day, so sorry if it's not as good. 
> 
> Have a good morning/day/night!!


	3. Night 3: "Family" and Friends (What is it like to be rejected?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was almost late... Oops...
> 
> I'm going back and changing the chapter titles a bit, but that's all. Nothing big. 
> 
> Enjoy~!

The third day of investigating was the same: lots of work with little to no progress. The group's mentor made the four a full dinner, which was much appreciated, before sending them off to bed.

He stood before his bed fearfully, hesitantly lowering himself onto it and covering himself with the soft covers. He yawned against his will, sleep was beckoning him.

He didn't want to answer it's call, but he had no choice as it took him by force.

\---

The next dream started just like the two before it: as soon as he fell asleep, Mutsuki was brought to the apartment. Except, this time, only one of the two usual family members was there. 

It was the boy. 

He stood in front of the table which was usually occupied by his mother as she worked endlessly into the night until she passed out from exhaustion. He carried a small bag by his side, his hand trembling slightly. 

"You worked so hard," he whimpered, hastily wiping his reddened eyes with his free hand. "Thank you."

"He _thanked_ her?!" Mutsuki jumped at the voice coming beside him and whipped around. He sighed when he saw it was only Shirazu, who stood beside Saiko and Urie, just like the other two nights before. 

"She was his mother, it's only natural." Urie scoffed, crossing his arms as he glared at the boy. 

"But still-"

"I wouldn't mourn my mother if she did things like that." Saiko said, continuing to watch the boy as he started to break down, still standing in front of the deserted table. 

Shirazu nodded, glaring at Urie. "Yeah. He's-"

_Knock, knock_

"Ken, we have to go now."

The boy sniffed and wiped his nose and eyes before answering with a shaky voice. "C-coming!" His grip on his bag tightened slightly as he turned away from the room and headed to the door. He hesitantly opened it to reveal his aunt. 

She stepped aside, making room for him to pass, and ushered him out the door. "Come on."

He took a deep breath before stepping forward, glancing over his shoulder back into the cold room as he was pushed along by his aunt. She led him to a car, where she gently settled him in before driving off, where they disappeared from view. 

Ken never tore his gaze from the house, even as it was lost from sight. 

\---

As Mutsuki blinked, the scene was different. He glanced around, quickly locating his squad mates, who stood beside him, before observing his surroundings. 

It was a nicely furnished dining room, complete with a table, four chairs, a rug, a tablecloth, and other miscellaneous wooden display cases and dressers, all prettied with glass objects and antique plates and silverware. There were four people seated at the table, three of which were talking and laughing while the fourth sat with his head down, busying himself with eating the meal in front of him. Upon closer inspection, Mutsuki realized that the fourth was Ken, and he was seated between his aunt and a boy who looked to be about the same age. Across from him sat a man, looking to be about as old as Ken's aunt. The three didn't pay any mind to the boy as he wordlessly ate his meal, and he didn't so much as glance up at them. 

He finally looked up as he finished his food, bowing slightly. "Th-thank you for the meal," he stammered, slowly getting up from his chair. 

"Oh, it's not problem, Ken-kun," his aunt said, smiling that sweet (fake) smile of hers. 

"I-I'm going to my room... Goodnight..."

"Goodnight, Ken-kun."

With that, Ken disappeared into the house, leaving the four Quinx standing silently, unnoticeable. 

\---

The next blink brought Mutsuki to a school playground. 

All four Quinx stood facing a corner, where two walls of the school building met, out of sight from any prying eyes. There stood two boys, who looked down upon a small figure which was cornered, with no way of escape. 

"Wimp." The first kicked the figure roughly, leaving a dark bruise where his foot connected with an arm. 

"Bookworm." The second stomped on the figure's foot, which was immediately retracted closer to the figure's dark clothing, dusted with dirt and mud. 

"Nerd."

"Idiot."

"Forever lonely."

"Useless."

The first leaned down, towering over the figure, and spit on it, scowling. "Just die already, you worthless shit."

Out of the corner of his eye, Mutsuki saw Shirazu take a threatening step forward, letting out a sound that sounded suspiciously like a growl. He cracked his knuckles, heading towards the two, but was held back by a hand on the shoulder from Urie, who just glared at him. "You can't do anything (dumbass)."

Mutsuki looked back to the figure, who he now realized was a small boy. He had his face hidden in his arms, which were curled into his body to make a tight ball. The two boys continued to kick and stomp on him, littering him with dark bruises which shown greatly on his pale skin. 

"Worthless piece of-"

"Leave him alone!"

The four jumped (well, except for Urie, who just blinked) and turned to the sound. A small boy was rushing towards them, holding a stick up threateningly. He had bright blond hair with dark brown roots - it was the same boy who had approached Ken in the classroom, boldly asking him to be his friend. 

The boy getting beat up was Ken. 

Following the boy was a tall woman, most likely a teacher of some sort. 

Seeing her, the two turned and fled, abandoning their prey to instead run along the side of the building and out of sight, leaving the woman to chase after them, which she did. The blond boy rushed over to Ken, who hesitantly lifted his head from its place, hidden in his arms. He looked up to the blond, smiling shakily. 

"Kaneki! You should stick up for yourself," The blond said, leaning down beside the other. He stuck out a hand, smiling brightly. "I'm taking _you_ to the nurse!"

Ken sighed, taking the boy's hand. "I'm fine, Hide."

"Nope! You're going to the nurse whether you like it or not!"

"Hiiiiiiideeeeeeeee..."

"Come on, let's go!" With that, the blond boy lifted Ken off the ground and dragged him around the building,the opposite way the other three and gone. 

\---

They were back in Ken's aunt's house. 

Ken stood, facing his aunt, as she held a stack of papers. He looked nervous, fidgeting and playing with his hands as he stood. After a while, she spoke. 

"Are these your tests, Ken-kun?" She looked up from the papers, eyeing the boy before her. 

He jumped, head shooting up. "Y-yes, ma'am," he squeaked. 

"Very good, Ken-kun." She smiled sweetly (fake). "Hmmm... You're smart like my little sister. I wish Yuichi were more like you. I'll fix something you like for dinner tonight."

Ken looked surprised, blinking blankly for a few seconds before coming back to reality. "Th-thank you," he said, bowing slightly before turning and disappearing into the house once again. 

\---

The next blink left them in the same place, in a similar situation as to what happened before, with Ken standing nervously before his aunt, wringing his hands and fidgeting, just like before. This time, though, instead of smiling and rewarding him as earlier, the boy's aunt scowled, slamming the papers on the table and turning towards Ken. He jumped, eyes widening as his aunt leaned over him. 

"What...? Are you trying to rub it in my face," she hissed, narrowing her eyes. 

"What...?" Ken shakily backed away, avoiding his aunt's gaze. 

Mutsuki gasped, eyes widening as he saw the boy's aunt growl out a 'little goody two-shoes' before stomping away, ripping up the papers and throwing them into the garbage can on her way out, leaving Ken alone in the room, looking broken. 

"That bitch," Shirazu hissed, punching his palm. 

Saiko just hummed in agreement. 

\---

The scene went black as voices rang around he four. The voices were all the same, hissing insults and negative phrases. 

The voice belonged to Ken's aunt. 

The phrases were directed at Ken himself. 

_"Always making me look bad..."_

_"So infuriating."_

_"You're not even my child so why should I..."_

_"I don't..."_

_"Even care about you."_

The boy was unloved. 

\---

The next blink flashed the group back to the dining room, but instead of the group that was seen before, the only person there was Ken. He was slightly older and stood above a small plate of food and a bowl. 

All that was there was a small piece of fish and some rice. 

Ken sighed, slowly sitting at the table to eat. 

Other than him, the house was empty. 

There was a note on the counter. 

Mutsuki followed Saiko as she headed over to the counter, picking up the note. She read it out loud: "Gone out to dinner. Food is on the table."

"She barely left anything, though..." Mutsuki whispered, glancing back at the boy as he slowly ate his 'dinner'. 

Shirazu crossed his arms. "As I said, she's a bitch."

"Be quiet already," Urie growled. 

"But-"

"Thank you for the food," Ken sighed, slowly standing and taking his plate to the kitchen. 

\---

They were in the same place as before. Ken stood before the table in a black uniform, holding up a small handful of money. He sighed, pocketing the bill before exiting the room, leaving the house empty. 

\---

"Yo, Kaneki."

_Blink._

It was a park. 

"Yeah?"

There were two boys sitting on a large whale in the center. 

"You know about ghouls, right?"

It was Hide and Ken. 

"Yeah, but not much."

They sat, side by side, looking up at the stars, eating fast food. 

"If you were a ghoul... would you eat Yoshikawa from Class 2? The girl you like."

"N-no... And I don't like her either..."

They were close - anybody could tell. The sound faded out, leaving the movement of their mouths as he only evidence that they were speaking. 

Seems like Ken was loved - even if it was only by one. 

\---

_BRIIIIING. BRIIIIING._

Mutsuki sat up, rubbing his eyes with one hand while slapping in the direction of his alarm clock with the other. He yawned, throwing his legs off of his bed and standing. 

_The lonely boy... unloved and unwanted._

_He's wanted now... I hope he realizes it._


	4. Night 4: Living in Fear (What is it like to be free?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit: I changed the beginnings to the chapters so they flow nicely and make more sense (thanks to who made the suggestion). 
> 
> I am so sorry this was late, I didn't have access to the books I needed in order to write this, I was visiting my family. 
> 
> I also kinda wasn't focusing on what needed to be done yesterday.... So I finished this last night so I could post it this morning... Hahah....
> 
> Anyways.... Enjoy~!

The fourth day.

The fourth dream.

The fourth time to see the lonely boy.

It effects him, but he doesn't show it.

He _can't_ let it show.

So, he goes to sleep as usual, he doesn't try to stay up, to stay out of the tragedy.

He'll have to go back someday. And he'd rather not miss what happens next. It's like watching a good movie, but stopping halfway through.

\---

"You're old enough. Get out."

That was the phrase he was met with as he was sent back into the dream. Urie turned to see the boy, Ken, who had to be 18 by now, if what that woman said was true. He faced _her_ , his aunt, in the doorway, him being the closest to the outside. She had her arms crossed in front of her, looking stern as she glanced towards the bags gathered beside her, which she kicked roughly towards him.

"I even went out of my way to gather your _things_ , so leave."

The pile was pitifully small, with only two small garbage bags with few contents inside.

The boy just nodded, taking the bags and leaving the woman. The 'evil' smile returned as she slammed the door behind him.

The three started gasping and talking beside him, but Urie payed them no mind, only half heartedly listening to snippets of their conversation.

He watched as the boy wandered the streets.

\---

Colors mixed in his vision, creating an unidentifiable mess around him before separating into a different scene.

It was a schoolyard.

Many children gathered, all clad in similar school uniforms, before a wall of boards. Posted were lists upon lists of names. Many of those present were celebrating, excitedly chatting with friends; while the rest were silent, seemingly lost as they wandered away from the successful. Ken stood, beside his blonde friend, observing the bulletin.

Suddenly, he gasped. "My name... It's there..."

While the blonde groaned. "Not mine..."

The raven stopped and went back to looking at the board. He tapped his friend's shoulder before pointing to one of them. "Yeah it is."

"Yesss!!" He pumped his arms towards the sky, hooting and hollering.

Ken sighed, exasperated, while watching the boy.

\---

_"The remains of a man's body were found on Takada Building Street in the 28th. Body fluid believed to have come from a ghoul was found at the scene. The authorities have begun investigating this as a ghoul attack. The horrific ghouls haunting the streets of Tokyo... what exactly are they? To answer that question, our guest today is ghoul researcher Dr. Ogura."_

They were brought to a coffee shop. It was small, cozy, filled with the quiet chatter of the patrons gathered there.

"Ooh. Check out this sketchy dude."

"Damn... The Takada Building isn't that far from here."

It was the blonde boy, Hide was his name, accompanied by the usual raven haired, Ken. They sat in an indented space in the wall, a table for two, with Ken nursing a cup of coffee while the other boy lay on the table.

"I bet you'd be eaten up before you knew it, Kaneki. Since you're a nerdy weakling always readin' those weird books," the blonde said, looking towards his friend.

Ken sighed. "Th-they're not weird..." He put his cup on the table beside his ever-present book. "Hide," he started, "you ought to expose yourself to more good writing."

"No way. Books knock me out in five seconds."

"But going back to earlier..." Ken paused, taking a sip of his coffee, "I've never seen a ghoul before. Do they really exist? Those monsters that eat people?"

_Typical uninformed pedestrian... Not believing in the scum that exists on the streets..._

"'Course they do." Hide sighed, lifting his head off of the table to instead place it on his arms. "They say ghouls hide amongst us disguised as humans. They could be closer than we think."

"Disguised as humans, huh...?"

Urie took the moment of silence to look around him, at the peaceful scene. A typical coffee shop, with people of all ages enjoying the company of others or peaceful on their own over a cup of steaming coffee. The two staff on shift, an old man and a teenage girl, went about their day in peace, tending to the customers as they needed it.

Suddenly, the blonde boy jumped up. "Wait a second! I bet you're a ghoul, Kaneki!"

Ken sighed, closing his eyes for a second as he took out a pencil and paper. "If I was a ghoul..." he started, "you'd be dead already." He began sketching something on the paper before him. "Even if they pass as humans, they're just human shaped, right?" Ken paused, holding up his finished drawing. " _This_ is probably what they look like."

It was a relatively human shaped creature, looking like one you'd find in a cliché horror film.

_He couldn't be more wrong..._

"Here's mine. It's you." The other held up his own drawing, it being a horrible sketch of his friend.

"Hey...!"

"Anyway, Kaneki." Hide tipped his empty cup from side to side, watching his friend. "Enough about ghouls."

"Huh?"

"Which one's the cute girl you've been talking about?"

"Huh?! Keep it down!" Ken hissed, glaring at the blonde. "And stop looking around..."

"Oh." Hide perked up. "Is that her?" He pointed towards one of the few staff, the teenage girl.

She had strange indigo colored hair, with it covering one of her eyes. She was currently talking to a customer, guiding them to their seat with a polite, "right this way, please."

Ken shook his head, blushing slightly. "No, she works here. I was talking about a customer."

The blonde payed him no mind. "Excuse me," he yelled.

"Huh?!"

"Yes?" She turned towards the pair.

"Can you take our order?!" Hide turned around in his chair to face the barista. "I'll have a cappuccino!" He quickly turned to his friend. "What about you?!"

"I... I'm fine," Ken stuttered.

"One cappuccino..." The waitress quickly scribbled it onto her notepad.

"Uh, sorry, but... Can I ask you your name?"

She looked startled, blinking before answering. "It's Touka Kirishima..."

_Wait... Kirishima... Where have I heard that before?..._

"Miss Kirishima!!" Hide jumped up, taking the girl's hands in his own. "Do you have a boyfriend?!"

Her one visible eye widened as she stared at the boy. "U-um... N-no... I don't!" With that, she hurried off.

"Come back!"

"Hide! What the hell, man?!" Ken growled.

"She's so cute..."

"Quit being obnoxious! This place is the only connection I have to the girl I was talking about! What if they ban us from--"

_Jingle, jingle._

The bell on the door sounded, breaking through the boy's conversation.

In walked a woman. Her purple hair hung down her back, contrasting with her neat, white dress. She delicately walked through the shop towards a seat in the back.

Hide continued, not minding the new arrival. "She was so cute I couldn't help myself! Huh...?" He looked to his friend, who was slumped into himself on the table. "What's wrong, dude?"

He lifted a shaky finger, pointing towards the woman. "Over there... That's her..."

Hide turned his vision to the girl as she walked past before going back to his friend. "Kaneki!!" He reached across the table, putting his hands on his friend's shoulders and looking to the wood surface. "I'm saying this for your own good... Give up!!"

"Huh...?!"

"She's way too hot for you," The blonde sighed, resting his chin on his hand. "If she took those glasses off, she'd be something else."

"Urgh..." Ken sighed. "I-I know... She's out of my league. I'm happy just looking at her from afar. Plus... when our eyes meet... she smiles a little bit."

As he said, when the woman looked up to see the boy watching her, she smiled politely.

Ken blushed, not looking away.

"You know what? You're kinda... creepy."

"What?!"

"She's forcing a smile cuz you're staring at her," Hide said.

"N-no way..."

"Well, I got to see the girl you were talking about. I should get going. Gotta go to work." Hide stood, making his way to the door. "Good luck, dreamer boy!" He stopped in front of Touka before leaving. "See ya later, Touka!!"

_Where do I know her from...?_

_Wait... It's the waitress from :Re._

_She worked here? But where exactly is 'here'?_

Ken sighed, picking up his book in an attempt to hide his glance towards the woman, who was also reading.

They were reading the same book: _Egg of the Black Goat_.

_Sasaki was reading that once..._

It stayed quiet for a while, the boy ignoring what was going on around him, until the woman stood, making her way over to the counter, just a _little_ bit too close to the boy, when she knocked into his book, sending it falling to the ground.

"I-I'm sorry..."

"I'm sorry!!"

They both exclaimed simultaneously while the woman reached down to pick it up off the floor. She paused. "Oh...? _Egg of the Black Goat_... It's good, isn't it? I'm actually reading it right now too... Are you a fan of Takatsuki?"

"Y-y-yes! I love Sen Takatsuki!" Ken jumped up, a deep blush present on his face. "I, uh... like mysteries!!"

"Oh, me too."

From then on, their talking grew distant as the waitress glanced over before returning to her work.

\---

This time, the two were at a different café.

"No way... And so you guys are going out on a date? I guess everybody gets lucky once in a while." The blonde sloshed around his drink I'm his cup while Ken sat, fidgeting in his chair.

"Yeah, so her name's Rize Kamishiro. We're gunna talk about our favorite books!" Ken brought his fist up from the table triumphantly. "It's my first-ever outing with a girl... On top of that, it's the bookstore date of my dreams!!" He placed his cheek on his fist, blushing furiously as he stared down at the table, stuck in his daydream. "Hide... I'm so happy I could die right now!"

"I don't see what's so great about a bookstore date but... I hope you have fun!" The blonde held up an encouraging thumbs up of approval.

\---

The colors separated to a restaurant. Ken and the woman sat at a small table, beside a window overlooking the street, where they were chatting lightly, the ever present blush on Ken's face.

"Which one's your best recommendation?"

"Hmm... Maybe her first one?"

"Oh! _Dear Kafka_! The trick with the letter was so unexpected." The woman, Rize, talked shyly, but, somehow, at the same time animatedly towards the other. "Her short stories are good too. Like _Monochrome Rainbow_... Huh...?" She looked worriedly to Ken, whose gaze had shifted. "Is everything alright?"

He flinched, coming back to the present. "Y-yeah... I was just, uh... Oh...? Just wondering why you're only eating a sandwich..."

"Oh..." She looked away, ashamed. "I've been eating too much lately. Um... I'm kind of on a diet." She stood, bowing politely. "Excuse me. I have to go to the ladies room."

"Of course! Go ahead!"

As she walked off, the boy followed her with his gaze until she disappeared, nodding to himself before glancing back at the sandwich, which only had a bite taken out of it.

\---

It was night.

The street lamps lining the sidewalks were lit with a dim glow, illuminating just enough to see in front of you.

The four stood against a building, waiting for what's to come.

As expected, they soon saw the boy, accompanying the woman from before.

They were still talking animatedly.

"Your blood type's AB?! Mine too!"

"Really? What a coincidence," Rize chuckled, grinning at him before looking towards the ground, a light blush dusting her cheeks. "Our taste in literature is the same... so is our age... We have so much in common." She met his gaze again, smiling sweetly.

The purple haired waitress from before passed by the two, following a chestnut haired girl who looked to be about her age. She stopped suddenly, watching as the boy passed by.

Her partner stopped a few paces ahead of her, turning to look back. "What's up, Touka?"

She stayed silent for a bit before answering. "...Nothing." With that, she continued walking, going in the opposite direction if the other two.

Urie started at a whisper behind him.

"This is like some anime... I bet she's gunna be important..."

It was Saiko, _the worthless shut-in who can't even work for her pay_.

Nobody else commented as they watched the two pairs disappear from sight.

\---

The colors stayed dark when they separated again.

It was still night, still the same day, too.

Ken and Rize stood facing each other beside a dark house; not abandoned, but just quiet, the occupants probably asleep.

"Thank you so much for today."

"No, thank you. I had fun!" Ken smiled, blushing, as usual. "Well, I'm going that way, so..."

Rize stopped him with a nervous "um...". Ken turned to her. "I live a bit past Takada building street... Did you hear about what happened there recently?"

"Oh... Uh, the ghoul... Yes..."

"It's been... bothering me." She brought a nervous hand to her mouth, visibly trembling. "I can hardly sleep at night. I've been afraid to go home alone..."

The scene's colors started blending together again. But, just before it all faded, he could hear Saiko's whisper. "Ooooh... Suspense..."

_Be quiet._

\---

Once again, it was night.

They were walking once again, the two. Side by side.

"...and so we all started firing bottle rockets at Hide." Ken was finishing a story, it seemed, laughing quietly.

"That's so mean!" Rize laughed, too. "But it sounds kinda fun too..."

"Oh yeah, I have some drawings Hide and I drew in my bag..." He lifted up his bag, rifling through it.

"Drawings...?"

"Yeah, they were talking about ghouls on the news so... Here they are." He held up the two papers to the girl. "Our ideas of what a ghoul looks like."

"Wow! That's really good!" Rize gasped, all comical with her hands over her mouth. "Hide's is rather unique..." She paused for a bit as they continued walking, engulfing them in silence before speaking up again. "It's strange though, isn't it?"

Ken looked towards her in question.

"That you and I are walking together... All because of Takatsuki's book. It's kind of amazing..."

Ken stopped as she did, turning back towards her.

Suddenly, she threw herself at him, burrowing her face into his jacket. He blushed madly.

"Kaneki... The truth is..." She looked up to him, blushing also. "I noticed the way you've been looking at me. Kaneki," she leaned in closer, "I've been," her voice got darker- "watching you too." -as she bit into his shoulder, sending blood spraying from the chunk she had taken of his flesh.

"Huh?" Ken's eyes widened as he looked down at his injured shoulder, as if he didn't notice it until a few seconds after it had happened.

She closed her eyes, and when she opened them again they were dark and glowing with a ghoul's signature kakugan. " _Ahhh_... Delicious..." She purred, stepped away as she gently wiped her face with the back of her hand.

Ken let out a cry of agony as he fell to the ground.

Saiko let out another whisper, "Plot twist..."

"Oh no..." She let a faux gasp, giggling evilly. "Are you alright? _Tee hee hee_..." She took a step closer to the boy, who laid trembling on the ground. "Hey, Kaneki... There's a scene I really like in _Egg of the Black Goat_..." She took another step closer, and then another, and another... "It's the one where the Black Goat rips out the guts of a man trying to run away. No matter how many times I read that part..." She shifted, stopping in front of Ken and taking the hair tie out of her hair before continuing. "It gets me so excited."

Ken sat, paralyzed on the ground as he watched her giggle manically.

" _Hee hee hee_... Your expression's beautiful. I understand... How could you have know? You could never have guessed... that I was a ghoul!!!" With that, her kagune ripped out of her back, eerily similar to the one belonging to the squad's mentor.

Ken gasped, still unmoving other than the trembling of his body.

" _Ooh_ , Kanekiii..." she purred. "Excite me..."

Finally, Ken gained the thought to get away, however futile it may be.

" _Ha ha_... Come back." Her kagune darted out after him, wrapping around his leg and pulling him across the ground, not bothering when his head smashed to the concrete. "Got ya," she said sweetly as he came to a stop in front of her. She poised a single red tentacle above him, swirling it leisurely. "Kanekiii... You've never felt a ghoul's claws before, have you?" She laughed. "Relax. I'll gouge out your insides gently... _Tee hee_..."

"That bitch..." He heard Shirazu hiss, but ignored him.

Ken shakily reached around, grabbing hold of his pen and slammed it ( _uselessly_ ) into her kagune. Of course, it bent in half, not even leaving a mark. But, it was enough of a distraction that Ken needed to get up and run.

She stopped for a bit, watching as the ruined pen fell to the ground, before sending a kagune tentacle after him.

It met its mark, going straight through the boy's stomach.

And he fell, eyes rolling back in his head, as she threw him into a building and he dropped to the ground, motionless.

She slowly walked after him, swinging the bloodied kagune around her. "Are you already dead," she questioned, not receiving and answer. " _Hee hee hee_. I like bodies like yours, Kaneki." A stack on beams groaned above them. "Just the right amount of fat. You're not very muscular, so you're tender... I wonder if you'll taste better than the two I ate earlier this week..."

The Binge Eater...

The beams groaned again, and a snap was heard.

"Hmm...?" The woman looked up, eyes widening as she caught sight of the scene above her.

The beams fell, crushing her, and blood sprayed.

You could just hear her final words... "Why... me?" ...before her eyes rolled back in her head.

Ken sat there, motionless.

Two different voices spoke up from a distance away.

"Hey, did you hear that?"

"Huh...?"

"Yo, is that...? Is somebody under those steel beams?!"

"Oh my god!! C-Call and ambulance!!"

Then, the scene faded to black.

\---

He sat up in his bed, shutting off his alarm clock before it could make a sound, and went about his day as usual.

He didn't join in on the worried expressions sent to his superior by his squad mates.

But he wanted to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra:  
> Saiko thinks Ken is now an adorable little cinnamon roll who needs to be protected at all costs. (I swear kuroneki is so freaking adorable)
> 
> Hope you liked it!
> 
> Don't be afraid to comment, I don't bite.  
> All creative criticism is appreciated. 
> 
> Go bother me and make sure I'm still alive on my Instagram: @weeb.olive_swan


	5. Author's Note

This is not a chapter, I'm sorry. 

I'm saying this first: this fic will continue, but it will take a while. 

The chapters are getting longer and are basically following parts of the manga (I mean, it _is_ Haise's past and all). They're not very exciting to write and I get distracted from things easily. Plus, I need the 6th volume of TG, which my friend has and says she has lost it. I use the volumes I have at my house and their translations, which come out every two months, and only up to volume 8 has been released. Luckily, I don't need past there until a few chapters, so I should be good for a while. 

The next chapters are going to take a long time to get out (between school, my lack of an attention span, and other things), maybe a month each. 

Once again, I am sorry and I hope you will still follow this fic, for it is going to update again. 

And to those of you (most of you) who don't have contact with me, Cheerioi can bug me all they want on Instagram. 

Thanks to all of you who have left comments and kudos, you guys help a lot.

Thank you for understanding. 

 

-Olive Swan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My Instagram: @weeb.olive_swan

**Author's Note:**

> I have read The Metamorphosis, by the way. It's a good book. I had a lengthy conversation with my teacher about it once and it gave everybody in my class a headache when they saw how many words were on a page (THERE WERE A LOT OF WORDS PER PAGE. That's why my copy was only like, 44 pages long). 
> 
> I honestly ship Saiko x Urie and Shirazu x Mutsuki, but I won't mention it in this fic. No ships. (I'm a hardcore Hidekane shipper, if you haven't noticed, but I will hold back.)
> 
> I've had this idea for a while, and this time, I actually have a brief plan of how its gunna go, so I won't take as long. 
> 
> Hide appears next chapter!! Also, some death for your souls.
> 
> If there are any mistakes, please tell me! Thanks!
> 
> Have a good morning/day/night!


End file.
